Food; Home @ 19 Jan 2007 12:35 pm by Christina Waters
Has this happened to you? We’re sitting in the boisterous interior of Sushi Totoro, on the Westside of Santa Cruz, winding down a dinner of saba and hamachi, listening to Bob Marley. All was well. But just as I picked up my last piece of nigiri, chopsticks still in my hand, my wooden plate was grabbed and whisked away. I mean while I was still chewing! No one asked me if I was “still workin’ on that.” No one inquired. No nothing. Just - whish! - the plate was yanked off the table.
Two words for that: how rude! No, you may not simply jerk the plate away from a diner. You ask first whether the diner is finished. If the reply is yes, THEN you jerk the plate off the table. Operant term here is “you jerk.” Back at the sushi place - another server approached my companion and tried to do the same thing. Hey, the place wasn’t packed - so it wasn’t as though we were being rushed out to make room for people waiting to be seated. But my companion literally held on to his plate and said, firmly but nicely, “no, I am NOT finished.” It was a sweet moment — and a blow for dining freedom.
Dear Servers: please do not reach for diners’ plates until they indicate by any number of codes, conventions or even words, that they are indeed finished with the dish. Remember: rudeness is rewarded by tiny tips.
This is one of my pet peeves. Even if one person is finsihed, the plate should not be taken away if your tablemate(s) are still enjoying their repast. Hey waiters, the meal is not a competion to see who can finsh first!
D. Plated
My pet peeve is wine service that gratifies those that empty their glasses fastest by refilling the lowest level glasses on the table first. This is particularly bothersome when I select a special (read expensive) bottle and want it to last through to my entree but the service refills the glass of an unappreciative quaffer at my expense during the appetizer leaving no seconds for me. That really frosts me. I don’t even like my glass filled and prefer to have only a few ounces in my glass at a time. I need to be more assertive and tell the server to leave the wine service to me! GT
And let’s just ponder for a moment that phrase “still workin’ on that?”. Shorthand version is simply “still workin’?”. I’m always tempted to say, I’m not WORKING, I’m EATING, if you don’t mind. And PS if it’s such hard WORK to eat your food, why am I here, or why would I ever come back.
I agree they shouldn’t start removing plates until everyone at the table is finished. It just makes the person still eating their meal feel rushed.
And how about the ones who don’t pay any attention to you until just before they bring you the bill - then they start hovering, smiling, and filling your water glass (which has been empty for half an hour).
And how about the ones who don’t use an order book because they think it looks cooler to just nod attentively while everyone recites what they want to eat. Like this makes it so much more personal. Invariably they forget something, place the wrong food in front of the wrong person, or otherwise goof it up. For god’s sake, just write things down like the rest of us.
Okay, I’m done for now.
Let’s get (closer) to the source of service issues regarding plates that are removed too early and phraseology that sound more like shop talk than acceptable dinner table interaction. Certainly servers should be responsible for their actions and use their common sense at their jobs but it is the business owners and managers that set (or fail to set) the parameters for service and training in their establishments. For me the type of behavior described in these posts reflects a failure of the owner/manager to institute a clear, professional approach to customer service and the rules of engagement for thoughtful dinner service in a dreadfully informal world. That said, it’s all still very annoying.
As for the insipid “unappreciative quaffers” among us maybe they should be left at home, be given a lesser wine to pound or have flow restrictors fitted to their wine glasses to make sure the expensive, high quality bottle makes it through the entree course. I see a problem with empty glasses at the dinner table but not with telling your server that your dinner partners are unrepentant lushes, that their mindless quaffing needs to be managed, and that you would be very pleased if a certain special bottle could last the entire meal. If you are drinking something special and you are in a less than special place, let the person know how you would like that special thing to be handled so you don’t go home cold and bitter.